Tuesday, March 31, 2020

Gray Hair Is Not So Bad

I found this blog I wrote on November 3, 2018.  I never published it.  I guess I didn't want anyone to feel bad if they choose to color their hair.  As I mentioned, if it makes you feel good then do it.  The only reason I thought about it now is the beauty shops are closed indefinitely because of the COVID-19 virus.  Some people may not have a choice and will be able to see what their true hair color is.

So here it is:

I haven't blogged for quite some time.  When I do, it's usually about our local wildlife or how the seasons and landscape changes around our property.  Once in a while, I get a bee in my bonnet about one thing or another.  Usually it's about my love/hate relationship with Facebook and No I am not writing about politics.  I know what I believe, and nothing I can say will change another persons mind.  I don't understand it, but I can't change it.  Too many factors come into play that I can't change.  People vote against their best interest because their parents and grandparents voted that way.  The political parties have changed, but people are stuck.  Which brings me to what I want to write about.  GRAY HAIR.

Gray hair has a bad rap.  The actual definition for Gray doesn't help.  "The color gray is an emotionless, moody color that is typically associated with meanings of dull, dirty and dingy, as well as formal, conservative and sophisticated.  The color gray is a timeless and practical color that is often associated with loss or depression."  Back in the day gray hair meant old, old and older, even more than now.  When I first noticed my gray hair, my mom encouraged me to color my hair.  I don't even remember when that was.  I was probably in my 40's.  I suppose my mother didn't want to be the mother of an old lady.  I had pretty dark hair so every gray hair showed up.  I colored my hair lighter and lighter to hide the gray.  I even convinced myself that I was blonde.  I wasn't fooling anyone, but the light bulbs in my bathroom gave my hair a golden tint.  Eventually I had no idea what my natural hair color was.  Then I got cancer.  I went through the whole process of losing all my hair.  It sounds terrible but when I had my husband shave my head, I felt more free than I ever had.  It was like a brand new start, and it changed my life.  I wasn't prepared for how it felt.  My hair is very thick so having no hair on my head felt really good.  I loved being able to wash my head with shower soap, and I didn't have to waste time drying it.  In public I was self conscience and got a wig.  It looked fake, it was hot and I was more uncomfortable wearing it than not.  I remember the day I pulled it off and gave it to the kids for Halloween.  It was that feeling of freedom all over again.  After treatment, my hair began to return.  It was pure gray.  I actually liked it.  I felt the same, I just looked different.  I didn't take pictures and I wish I would have.  This photo I am showing is the only one I have as my hair was coming back.

I would not have had the courage to grow it out if it hadn't happened naturally.  To this day I would have been trying to convince people I was a natural blonde.

There are so many advantages to going gray.  First of all, it's cheaper.  No more long trips to the hairdresser.  I know hairdressers need to make a living, but I'm pretty sure none of them are getting rich from those on Social Security.  All I do is go in for a haircut now and then.  $20 every two months and I'm good to go.  Someone estimated that 25 years of getting your hair colored added up to $65,000.  Imagine what you could do with an extra $65,000.  Think about how many people aren't satisfied with their natural color anyway.  They are getting their hair frosted or highlighted or whatever else is in style.  I figure you might as go natural and if that is gray, so be it.  You are still yourself.

Next it frees up tons of time.  I don't have to go to the store for coloring or sit in a beauty shop for hours.  I don't have to obsess about my roots.  My roots are always gray.   I have hours of time to do what I want to do.

Lastly, you may as well admit your age.  How many times have you seen a woman (or man for that matter) with lovely raven locks.  Then they turn around and the face gives it away.  Would you rather be noticed for beautiful gray hair and a face that matches or that other person I just described.  You can't fool anyone, especially all the Facebook friends you graduated from high school with.  Maybe 10 years or so younger, but not 30 years.

There, I said it.  Some people naturally never turn gray and that is wonderful.  I also realize most people who color their gray will continue to do because it just makes them feel good, but for me it was something that weighed me down and I didn't even know it.  Fact is, your hair color isn't what draws people to you or away from you.  It could be what comes out of your mouth, but that's another story.  Just be yourself.


  1. I stopped dying my hair years ago basically because I'm cheap and I did worry a bit about all those chemicals. It is freeing! And I've reached the age where I don't give a .... what people think. There is a great group on Facebook called Going Gray Looking Great and I think the women who do this look better than when their hair was dyed!

    1. You are right Kim. We really have to meet in person some day. We are on the same wave length in so many ways.

  2. I enjoyed this!
    I dye my hair. I married late (at age 35) to a younger man. He asked me to dye before we married because I was very grey and I liked it that way.😍 He now grows a beard for me. I'm waiting for the time when he feels comfortable for me to go grey.❤